Bo Bian, i ate porridge for lunch cos i was really hungry. I cant even bite the fish cake properly the food already v soft liao..i feel like a sick patient. Not only my teeth pain my heart oso pain..This week not so good mood, 心不在焉 Tuesday, Guitar lessons i didnt really listen properly..i feel bad. But i think cher sort of know im not in a good mood so he never say anything...talked to Sister after class, it looks like both of us are in the same situation, we both looked so 反. Asking ourselves, Actually what on earth are we doing all the while? Im still hesitating of quitting ballet, but i will take my sister's advise to quit for a while and then see if i still missed ballet. U all must be asking me why quit ballet, cos already take for so many years dont i feel so wasted just quit like tt...i oso ask myself this question.
The reason is that in ballet lessons i feel like a loser..REALLY! Its not like last time where i used to enjoy ballet lessons, i feel so pressurised especially by my classmates. Always trying to keep up with them, i know i cant compete with them in terms of phyiscaly already cos i know lose to them. Thinking im not tall, skinny enough will not change anything..i even cant in par with my skills and their skills. WHAT CAN I DO? I feel so drained everyday... i was hopping for some encouragement from my parents.I was thinking why i always have to do what pple tell me what to do...im sick of it liao. This time round i hope will be different. This time round i wan to break free and be independent, but will i be able to stand up on my feel again?
"Escape will not solve the problem, we must face the problem"
